Christmas

It is currently about 3:15 pm on December 23, 2009. I sit in Kabul, Afghanistan, pondering the past, present, and the future. Two years have come to pass since I left home in October of 2007. It has been a bumpy road, one filled with triumph, sadness, joy, and sometimes depression. We received a suicide awareness briefing a few weeks ago, with the Battalion chaplain coming in and stressing the need to watch over each other during the holiday season and keep each other in good joy. As I sit here and ponder my current situation, I feel no sadness at missing Christmas, I just feel a sort of longing. Longing to hold my wife in my arms, to watch the joy on my four year old nephew's face as he opens gifts from "Calvin." He made a comment the other day, one that touched me very deeply. As he and his mother were driving down the road, he told his mom that he was going to buy an airplane so he could fly "Calvin" back and forth so he can see him. I am glad for his sake that he does not understand the reasoning for me being here. Missing the cutting of the ham, the drinking of the egg nog, and the warmth of a house full of family, love and cheer. I take great pride in the fact that I will be surrounded by my brothers and sisters in arms. I will be surrounded by Brits, Aussies, Canadians, Hungarians, French, Czechs, Spaniards, and others. We are all just ordinary people taken away from our loved ones in ways that we did not ask for, but knew that it was a possibility. We will sit around the table on Christmas, blessed by each others company, but all knowing that we are missing one thing, and that is the warmth and love that only your family can provide. I signed my name to a piece of paper four years ago not knowing where the path would lead me. I do not regret my decision for one moment, and have been blessed by those who not only know and love me, but those who have never met me, have merely seen my name on Facebook and taken me under their wings with words of encouragement and love. I thank you all for those words. I take comfort in the knowledge that in two months I will be home with my family again and am fully ready to come home. I know that this post was rambling and slightly incoherent, but I simply wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Years. I beg you as you sit at the table for dinner on Friday, to look your loved ones in the eyes, tell them you love them, and do not take simple freedoms for granted. God Bless and protect.

SPC Hatfield
Kabul, Afghanistan